What to do with the pain of another?

Thoughts and prayers?

Send flowers?

Offer too many words and advice with good intentions but bad timing?

When Job’s three friends heard about all the troubles that had come upon him, they set out from their homes and met together by agreement to go and sympathize with him and comfort him.

When they saw him from a distance, they could hardly recognize him; they began to weep aloud, and they tore their robes and sprinkled dust on their heads.

Then they sat on the ground with him for seven days and seven nights.

No one said a word to him, because they saw how great his suffering was.

‭‭Job‬ ‭2‬:‭11‬-‭13‬ ‭NIV‬‬

The pain and suffering of those we love makes us uneasy at best and ineffectual at worst.

Job’s circumstances were so horrific there was literally no consolation to be given.

His three friends agreed on a plan.

They joined him in his grief and sat together with him in silence.

Ask anyone whose episode of grief left them at such loss to know what they needed at the time, just the company of a compassionate friend would be their first choice.

Struggling for the right words to speak, grasping for answers and explanations, believing that enjoining obligates you to solving the mystery of why or how…these are all YOUR issues that will only complicate another’s grief.

They sat with him for as long as he needed because that’s what friends do.

One of the great OT songs of worship…

Stand up and praise the Lord your God, who is from everlasting to everlasting.” “Blessed be your glorious name, and may it be exalted above all blessing and praise.

You alone are the Lord. You made the heavens, even the highest heavens, and all their starry host, the earth and all that is on it, the seas and all that is in them. You give life to everything, and the multitudes of heaven worship you.

‭‭Nehemiah‬ ‭9‬:‭5‬-‭6‬ ‭NIV‬‬

…Was followed by great truths given not to constrain but to explain how we can truly live:

You gave them regulations and laws that are just and right, and decrees and commands that are good.

‭‭Nehemiah‬ ‭9‬:‭13‬ ‭NIV‬‬

Yet still, time after time, we rebel, repent, and eventually return to you:

But as soon as they were at rest, they again did what was evil in your sight. Then you abandoned them to the hand of their enemies so that they ruled over them. And when they cried out to you again, you heard from heaven, and in your compassion you delivered them time after time.

‭‭Nehemiah‬ ‭9‬:‭28‬ ‭NIV‬‬

It’s the pattern of our lives on repeat isn’t it?

God’s mercies to us are new every morning and his patience with us is eternal.

Cycles of living out our faith as believers aren’t pretty, but are ageless and timeless reminders that our stories always end at the feet of a graceful and loving God.

Search me, God, and know my heart; test me and know my anxious thoughts. See if there is any offensive way in me, and lead me in the way everlasting.

‭‭Psalms‬ ‭139‬:‭23‬-‭24‬ ‭NIV‬‬

How I know I’m drifting is when I suspect I’m hiding.

Once I think I’m self aware, it’s time for a Godly peel of my onion.

True self awareness is recognizing that growth is painful and yet still running there at full gallop.

Self awareness is unbridled humility riding complete trust in the path and outcome.

Your best intentions are undoubtedly those which come under an attack of lies:

Sanballat sent his aide to me with the same message, and in his hand was an unsealed letter in which was written: “It is reported among the nations—and Geshem says it is true—that you and the Jews are plotting to revolt, and therefore you are building the wall. Moreover, according to these reports you are about to become their king and have even appointed prophets to make this proclamation about you in Jerusalem: ‘There is a king in Judah!’ Now this report will get back to the king; so come, let us meet together.”

Meet the attack with truth despite who believes it.

Nehemiah sent him this reply: “Nothing like what you are saying is happening; you are just making it up out of your head.”

Unmask their plan then pray through the attack.

They were all trying to frighten us, thinking, “Their hands will get too weak for the work, and it will not be completed.”

But I prayed, “Now strengthen my hands.””

‭‭Nehemiah‬ ‭6‬:‭5‬-‭9‬ ‭NIV‬‬

When doing the Lord’s work you can always expect one thing: opposition.

People and politics are pawns moved in a game you are not obliged to play.

Stay your course. Embrace your goal. Pray your path forward. Keep the faith.

James 4:7: “Submit yourselves, then, to God. Resist the devil, and he will flee from you”

Distractions are subtractions.

If you’d have said I could go back and meet my 9 year old self I’d have said you were experiencing a high flu fever.

Attribute it to what you want but i swear I just did, as real as real can be at 330am this morning.

It was in a dream and in all my 64 years to date I never recall having had been given such a lucid albeit brief opportunity to unite my present day self with nine year old Donnie and my deceased father altogether along one dreamscape during which I was acutely aware not to squander such a moment.

Nine year old Donnie was crouched alone preoccupied underneath a table at a bowling alley where he’d been left many times before while mom was in a nearby bingo lounge.

I reached down and scooped me/him up and into my arms from that same floor where in an earlier present day dream, my 64 year old self ran up to and had been scooped up and into the arms of my own dad for a long hug and embrace after so many years apart.

The significance of these side by side dreams is still emerging as I try now to document details of both accounts while fresh from the vivid lucid dreamscape.

I held little Donnie on my lap and hugged him while rushing to decide which of many advices to share with him from this elderly senior version while our time together ticked away might make the biggest difference for his future.

“Don’t ever do drugs,” and “be confident in yourself” were the first two that fell out of my mouth as we sat together eye to eye atop that table against the deafening sounds of the bowling alley in the background.

And as quickly as this meeting had afforded its opportunity, it left when the possibility I might pee the bed if I didn’t run off to the bathroom became apparent.

I have never experienced a dreamscape as healing before to my relationship with myself both then and now.

Jehoram was thirty-two years old when he became king, and he reigned in Jerusalem eight years. He passed away, to no one’s regret, and was buried in the City of David, but not in the tombs of the kings.”

‭‭2 Chronicles‬ ‭21‬:‭20‬ ‭NIV‬‬

It took evil King Jehoram just eight years terrible at his job to alienate himself from his staff and subjects.

He died to no one’s regret and was buried apart from where kings are usually buried.

The world is a cruel place.

It remembers and punishes

Contrast that with Jesus who upon our confession, remembers our sins no more and rewards us with a place at his eternal table.

As far as the east is from the west, so far has he removed our transgressions from us. —Psalm 103:12

Don’t wait until life is over and you’re hated, lying in disgrace because of who you were when you were alive.

Make good memories while you still can.

Uzziah sought God during the days of Zechariah, who instructed him in the fear of God. As long as he sought the Lord, God gave him success.”

‭‭2 Chronicles‬ ‭26‬:‭5‬ ‭NIV‬‬

But after Uzziah became powerful, his pride led to his downfall.

‭‭2 Chronicles‬ ‭26‬:‭16‬ ‭NIV‬‬

Humility is about as close to pride’s opposite as you can find.

Philippians 2:3-4 (NIV) Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit. Rather, in humility value others above yourselves, not looking to your own interests but each of you to the interests of the others.

James 4:10 (NIV) Humble yourselves before the Lord, and he will lift you up.

Proverbs 22:4 (NIV) Humility is the fear of the Lord; its wages are riches and honor and life.

1 Peter 5:5-6 (NIV) In the same way, you who are younger, submit yourselves to your elders. All of you, clothe yourselves with humility toward one another, because, ‘God opposes the proud but shows favor to the humble.’ Humble yourselves, therefore, under God’s mighty hand, that he may lift you up in due time.

Matthew 23:12 (NIV) For those who exalt themselves will be humbled, and those who humble themselves will be exalted.”

Micah 6:8 (NIV) He has shown you, O mortal, what is good. And what does the Lord require of you? To act justly and to love mercy and to walk humbly with your God.

Proverbs 11:2 (NIV) When pride comes, then comes disgrace, but with humility comes wisdom.

Pride is at greater risk when you are in high places but not exonerated in low spaces.

You want the truth?

The king of Israel answered Jehoshaphat, “There is still one prophet through whom we can inquire of the Lord, but I hate him because he never prophesies anything good about me, but always bad. He is Micaiah son of Imlah.” “The king should not say such a thing,” Jehoshaphat replied.”

‭‭2 Chronicles‬ ‭18‬:‭7‬ ‭NIV‬‬

You can’t handle the truth!

The messenger who had gone to summon Micaiah said to him, “Look, the other prophets without exception are predicting success for the king. Let your word agree with theirs, and speak favorably.” But Micaiah said, “As surely as the Lord lives, I can tell him only what my God says.

‭‭2 Chronicles‬ ‭18‬:‭12‬-‭13‬ ‭NIV‬‬

Micaiah declared, “If you ever return safely, the Lord has not spoken through me.” Then he added, “Mark my words, all you people!

‭‭2 Chronicles‬ ‭18‬:‭27‬ ‭NIV‬‬

Sometimes the truth hurts.

Micaiah’s prophesy wasn’t what the king wanted to hear so he wasn’t often consulted.

Though it would have saved his life, he rejected the truth for a deception of lies and paid the ultimate price.

“I told you so” is not what we want to hear after making a bad decision on wicked counsel.

2 Timothy 4:3, states that people will accumulate teachers who “tickle their ears” to hear what they want to hear rather than the truth.

A genuinely worthy friend will always tell you the truth, good or bad, because they love you more than your approval.

In the thirty-ninth year of his reign Asa was afflicted with a disease in his feet. Though his disease was severe, even in his illness he did not seek help from the Lord, but only from the physicians.

‭‭2 Chronicles‬ ‭16‬:‭12‬ ‭NIV‬‬

I’m no king of Judah, but my feet have been in pain for a decade with peripheral neuropathy.

General and specialist physicians across the medical spectrum have no healing solutions so I take pain management meds morning and night to make mere walking bearable.

I have ascribed countless huge biblical events to sovereign acts of God, unexplained by human reasoning but still cry in pain at the mere touch of bedsheets on my feet.

That my condition is not yet healed despite a decade of prayer to the Omnipotent, I rest and endure in knowledge that He is able but not yet willing, otherwise I’d be back playing softball and running around with my grandsons.

Sometimes accepting that God’s plan, purpose or will means not now, not yet, or perhaps not ever in this life is itself the divine purpose enacted in my suffering.

Not my will, but yours be done.

There’s a reason for everything and while my finite knowledge may not yet understand, I trust in God with millions of afflicted others whose unwavering faith in the unknown awaits the one day we will, indeed, know and understand and we finally all be pain free forever.

All your achievements in this life…

King Solomon was greater in riches and wisdom than all the other kings of the earth. All the kings of the earth sought audience with Solomon to hear the wisdom God had put in his heart.

‭‭2 Chronicles‬ ‭9‬:‭22‬-‭23‬ ‭NIV‬‬

…will come to an end just like everyone else…

Solomon reigned in Jerusalem over all Israel forty years. Then he rested with his ancestors and was buried in the city of David his father. And Rehoboam his son succeeded him as king.

‭‭2 Chronicles‬ ‭9‬:‭30‬-‭31‬ ‭NIV‬‬

…with no promise of a lasting legacy.

After Rehoboam’s position as king was established and he had become strong, he and all Israel with him abandoned the law of the Lord.

‭‭2 Chronicles‬ ‭12‬:‭1‬ ‭NIV‬‬

Life’s a bi__h and then you die.

The book of Ecclesiastes, one of King Solomon’s own works, reflects on the meaning of life and the human experience emphasizing the vanity and transience of worldly pursuits.

We become so engrossed in amassing wealth, prestige, and other definitional measures of our personal success, we often lose sight of accomplishing truly lasting measures that help ensure legacy in this world and in the one beyond.

Rehoboam, in a single generation, essentially reversed the legacy of his father Solomon.

But it was Solomon who, despite his wealth, wisdom and fame, gave us the lasting wisdom that it is all vanity, a meaningless existence in the big picture of eternity.

What maelstrom of accomplishments are you caught up in at the expense of an eternal remembrance?

Legacy matters only in the personal gifts of love, obedience, and worship you can leave not to other people, but to an eternal God.